the best form i’ve ever had to fill out

republic of botswana medical form

Basically, this form has not been changed for about 50 years.

For those interested:

Favus is a scalp fungus, easily treatable with a modern antifungal.

Framboesia and/or yaws (two names for more or less the same thing) is a rather horrible ulcerating disease that can destroy your bones…  But it’s easily treatable with penicillin, and accordingly its prevalence was reduced by 95% sometime in the 1960s.

And so now you know: I don’t have syphilis. Nor am I an imbecile. Here’s an excerpt of my interaction with the doctor at the walk-in clinic:

ME:  So, I’m going to Botswana, and I need this medical form filled out.

DOCTOR: [TAKES FORM] Oh, Botswana, that’s interesting.. where is that again? Will you need any lab tests for this?

ME: It’s just above South Africa. And..  tests.. well, I don’t think so. Have a look.

DOCTOR: [ACTUALLY READS FORM, RAISES EYEBROWS] … Really?

ME: Yeah.

DOCTOR: Well, you don’t look like an idiot…  Do you have syphilis?

ME: Pretty sure I don’t.

DOCTOR: Okay. [SIGNS FORM]

Thus certified as being free of all the important contagions and mental illnesses, I was permitted to reside in the country of Botswana.

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2 responses to “the best form i’ve ever had to fill out

  1. my grad school forms fall so far short of this…

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